What Is Kpop Funny Jokes for Kids

Q: Which dinosaur knew the virtually words?   A: The thesaurus.

Q: Which dinosaur knew the well-nigh words?   A: The thesaurus.

Why do artists constantly experience common cold?   Because they're surrounded past drafts.

Why practise artists constantly experience cold?   Because they're surrounded by drafts.

Knock! Knock! Who's in that location? Yule log. Yule log who? Yule log the door after y'all allow me in, won't yous?

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Yule log. Yule log who? Yule log the door after you let me in, won't you?

Q: Who did Frankenstein'south monster bring to prom? A: His ghoulfriend.

Q: Who did Frankenstein's monster bring to prom? A: His ghoulfriend.

Q: What does a nosey pepper do? A: Gets jalapeño concern!

Q: What does a nosey pepper practice? A: Gets jalapeño business!

After cleaning my five-yr-sometime patient'southward teeth, I accompanied him to the reception area, only to see him struggle with the oak door. "It's heavy, isn't it?" I asked. "Yep," he said. "Is that so children can't escape?" Jennifer Sloetjes, Fort McMurray, Canada

After cleaning my v-yr-sometime patient'southward teeth, I accompanied him to the reception area, merely to come across him struggle with the oak door. "It's heavy, isn't it?" I asked. "Yes," he...

I was visiting a friend who could non find her cordless phone. Afterwards several minutes of searching, her young girl said, "You lot know what they should invent? A telephone that stays connected to its base of operations so it never gets lost."

I was visiting a friend who could not find her cordless phone. After several minutes of searching, her immature daughter said, "Y'all know what they should invent? A phone that...

A concerned constabulary officer approaches a male child who is crying in front of a newsstand. "What's wrong?" the cop asks. "Superman isn't out yet!" says the boy. "I'll handle information technology," the cop assures him. "Hey, Superman!" he shouts. "Come on out! We won't hurt you!" —Source: Funny in Croatia Survey

A concerned police officeholder approaches a boy who is crying in front of a newsstand. "What'south incorrect?" the cop asks. "Superman isn't out yet!" says the boy. "I'll handle it,"...

The topic for my third-grade form was genetics. Smile broadly, I pointed to my dimples and asked, "What trait do you think I passed on to my children?" One pupil chosen out, "Wrinkles!"

The topic for my third-form class was genetics. Smiling broadly, I pointed to my dimples and asked, "What trait practise you think I passed on to my children?" One student...

Sam's eighth birthday, my brother took him to a football game. During halftime, a Marine ring played, and Sam studied them intently. "Why the involvement in the band?" his father asked. "I'k checking to run into if Ben and Matt from our synagogue are in it. They're Marines." "Simply they're in Afghanistan." "If I were in a marching band, I'd say I was in Afghanistan too."

Sam's eighth birthday, my brother took him to a football game game. During halftime, a Marine ring played, and Sam studied them intently. "Why the interest in the band?" his father...

As I was treating my daughter and her family to the buffet at a casino, all the bells and whistles for a winning slot motorcar began to get off. My seven-year-erstwhile grandson was awed. "Wow!" yelled Casey. "This is like Chuck Due east. Cheese for old people."

As I was treating my daughter and her family unit to the buffet at a casino, all the bells and whistles for a winning slot motorcar began to get off. My...

When my 8-yr-one-time asked how I knew I was pregnant, I told her I had taken a pregnancy test. "Oh," she said. "What questions were on the exam?"

When my eight-year-erstwhile asked how I knew I was pregnant, I told her I had taken a pregnancy test. "Oh," she said. "What questions were on the test?"

My 2nd graders were assigned the task of writing thank-you cards to soldiers serving in the Middle Eastward. One of them wrote, "Cheers for protecting united states of america! I hope we win!"

My 2d graders were assigned the task of writing thank-you lot cards to soldiers serving in the Middle East. 1 of them wrote, "Thank you for protecting us! I hope we...

At a baby shower, everyone was asked to consummate nursery rhymes. My xi-yr-old daughter Taylor contributed this: "Jack Sprat could eat no fatty.

His married woman could eat no carbs."

At a babe shower, everyone was asked to complete nursery rhymes. My 11-year-old daughter Taylor contributed this: "Jack Sprat could eat no fat. His wife could eat no carbs."

A few weeks? afterwards the expiry of my father-in-law, I establish my seven-yr-old son crying in bed. His grandmother had died the previous twelvemonth, and he was taking it all very hard. "You lot know, Kyle," I said, "when we dice, we'll get to see Grandma and Grandpa again in heaven."

With tears spilling downwards his face, Kyle cried, "That's like shooting fish in a barrel for you to say. You don't have that long!"

A few weeks? after the death of my begetter-in-law, I plant my seven-year-erstwhile son crying in bed. His grandmother had died the previous year, and he was taking it all...

When I took my school-historic period daughters to a lunch with veterans, I told them to ask questions. One of the men said he'd fought in the Korean War, and the girls were so impressed that the eldest wanted to know more: "Did y'all fight for the Northward or the S?"

When I took my school-age daughters to a dejeuner with veterans, I told them to ask questions. Ane of the men said he'd fought in the Korean War, and the...

My five-year-one-time nephew has ever happily answered to BJ. That concluded when he came home from his starting time day of school in a foul mood. It seems his teacher took roll, and he never heard his proper noun.

"Why didn't anyone tell me my proper name was William!?" he complained.

My five-twelvemonth-old nephew has always happily answered to BJ. That ended when he came home from his start twenty-four hours of school in a foul mood. It seems his teacher took...

Our six-yr-former daughter, Terra, has a need to ask questions … lots of questions. Finally, ane mean solar day, my wife had had it.

"Have yous e'er heard that curiosity killed the cat?" my wife asked.

"No," replied Terra.

"Well, there was a cat, and he was very inquisitive. And one day, he looked into a large hole, vicious in, and died!"

Terra was intrigued: "What was in the hole?"

Our 6-year-one-time daughter, Terra, has a need to ask questions … lots of questions. Finally, one day, my wife had had it. "Have you ever heard that curiosity killed the...

I saturday in the doctor's waiting room watching a young mother try desperately to control her three loud children. "They're not a very skillful advertisement, are they?" she groaned apologetically.

A man muttered, "Only if you're advertising contraceptives."

I sat in the dr.'s waiting room watching a young mother try desperately to control her 3 loud children. "They're not a very good advertisement, are they?" she groaned apologetically....

"Where is Pearl Harbor?" I asked my fourth-grade history class. "Hither'southward a hint: It'southward a place where everyone wants to get."

1 student blurted out, "Candy Land!"

"Where is Pearl Harbor?" I asked my fourth-grade history class. "Here's a hint: Information technology's a place where everyone wants to go." Ane student blurted out, "Processed Land!"

When my eight-yr-old sister came to visit, I took a day off from my chore at the Pentagon and showed her the Lincoln Memorial. There she saw a big cake of text—273 words long—etched into the monument.

"What's that?" she asked.

"Lincoln's Gettysburg Address," I told her.

"If that's his address, how does he become any mail?"

When my 8-year-onetime sis came to visit, I took a day off from my job at the Pentagon and showed her the Lincoln Memorial. There she saw a large block...

I picked up my nine-year-quondam girl from school and asked how her 24-hour interval had gone. A few minutes later on, I repeated the question, and again a few minutes afterward that. Instead of bellyaching, Ariana was philosophical.

"Mom," she said, "your amnesia is my déjà vu."

I picked upwardly my 9-yr-old daughter from schoolhouse and asked how her twenty-four hour period had gone. A few minutes afterward, I repeated the question, and over again a few minutes subsequently that....

I should take known better than to take my iv-year-sometime son shopping with me. I spent the unabridged time in the mall chasing later on him. Finally, I'd had it. "Practice you want a stranger to have you?!" I scolded.

Thrilled, he yelled back, "Will he have me to the zoo?"

I should have known ameliorate than to have my four-year-one-time son shopping with me. I spent the entire fourth dimension in the mall chasing subsequently him. Finally, I'd had it. "Do...

Our 3-year-old daughter was making up a poem when she asked us what rhymed with cease.

My married man said, "Think of something that's cool and refreshing just that Mom and I don't let y'all drinkable."

Our daughter knew the reply: "Booze!"

Our three-year-quondam daughter was making upward a poem when she asked u.s.a. what rhymed with finish. My husband said, "Recollect of something that's cool and refreshing but that Mom and...

My two sons, Jake and Austin, are a scattering. So I wasn't surprised that Dad looked frazzled later nosotros took them to a football game.

"It volition be a cold day in #@%* before we come to another game," he muttered.

"Did yous hear that?" Jake shouted to Austin. "Grandpa's going to take us to a game in December!"

My two sons, Jake and Austin, are a handful. So I wasn't surprised that Dad looked frazzled subsequently we took them to a football game. "It will exist a cold...

While my three-twelvemonth-former grandson was attending a altogether party, his friend's father sneaked off to take a shower before piece of work. Halfway through, the begetter heard a tapping on the shower door, followed past the sight of my grandson peering in. Looking around the stall, he asked, "Is my mom in here?"

While my three-year-old grandson was attending a altogether party, his friend'south father sneaked off to accept a shower before work. Halfway through, the male parent heard a tapping on the shower...

My daughter loved the picture frame her v-year-quondam son bought her for Mother's Day. She found a photograph of him and replaced the cat photo that came with it. Landon became upset: "Why are yous putting a picture of me in there when I bought you a motion-picture show of a cat?"

My daughter loved the moving picture frame her 5-yr-quondam son bought her for Mother'south Day. She found a photograph of him and replaced the cat photo that came with it. Landon...

My thirteen-year-old nephew thought his "gangsta" outfit—low-riding pants and exposed boxers—made him wait absurd. That is, until the day his five-year-one-time cousin took notice. "Nathaniel," she yelled out in front of everyone. "Your panties are showing."

My 13-year-onetime nephew idea his "gangsta" outfit—low-riding pants and exposed boxers—made him look cool. That is, until the 24-hour interval his five-twelvemonth-quondam cousin took notice. "Nathaniel," she yelled out in forepart...

All parents are proud of overachieving children, and i male parent was no exception. The bumper sticker on his auto read "My Kid Fabricated Your License Plate."

All parents are proud of overachieving children, and one father was no exception. The bumper sticker on his car read "My Kid Fabricated Your License Plate."

Our friend tells everyone that he began losing his hair while serving in Vietnam. His granddaughter incorporated that data into her grade school history report on the war. She wrote, "My Grandpa went to Vietnam and got his hair shot off."

Our friend tells anybody that he began losing his hair while serving in Vietnam. His granddaughter incorporated that information into her grade school history written report on the war. She wrote,...

Following his motivational talk at a Weight Watchers coming together, my father noticed one customer'southward small son climbing onto a calibration.

"Don't go on that, Joey," warned the male child'due south slightly older brother.

"It makes people cry."

Following his motivational talk at a Weight Watchers meeting, my begetter noticed one client's pocket-sized son climbing onto a scale. "Don't keep that, Joey," warned the male child's slightly older...

My 5-twelvemonth-old grandson was looking through some former photos when he noticed his grandad in his Marine dress blues.

"What kind of costume is that?" he asked.

"That'southward not a costume," his grandfather growled. "Men take died for that uniform."

The boy looked upwardly and said, "And so you stole it, then?"

My five-year-quondam grandson was looking through some old photos when he noticed his granddaddy in his Marine dress dejection. "What kind of costume is that?" he asked. "That's non a...

Nosotros were shopping for dress when my 13-year-old daughter spotted a hat with "Guinness" written on information technology. She put information technology on and proclaimed, "Expect! I'm a genius!"

We were shopping for wearing apparel when my xiii-year-quondam girl spotted a chapeau with "Guinness" written on it. She put it on and proclaimed, "Await! I'chiliad a genius!"

My husband, a deputy district chaser, was education an antidrug class to a group of Cub Scouts. When he asked if anyone could list the gateway drugs, one Lookout man had the answer: "Cigarettes, beer, and marinara."

My married man, a deputy commune attorney, was pedagogy an antidrug class to a group of Cub Scouts. When he asked if anyone could list the gateway drugs, one Scout had...

Our unproblematic school was honoring local veterans. The students were a fleck intimidated and didn't know how to approach them.

"Showtime by introducing yourself,"

I said. "So ask what branch of the military they served in."

One pupil walked over to a vet and promptly asked, "What tree are you from?"

Our elementary schoolhouse was honoring local veterans. The students were a bit intimidated and didn't know how to approach them. "Start by introducing yourself," I said. "So ask what co-operative...

I stole a couple of minutes from piece of work to give my wife a call. She put my 2-twelvemonth-old son on, and we chatted a while before he concluded information technology with an enthusiastic "I dear y'all!"

"I dear y'all as well," I said, with a dopey grin plastered on my face. I was virtually to hang upward when I heard him ask sweetly, "Mommy, who was that?"

I stole a couple of minutes from piece of work to requite my married woman a call. She put my two-year-old son on, and we chatted a while before he ended it with...

At our supermarket, I noticed a woman with four boys and a infant. Her patience was wearing sparse as the boys called out, "Mommy! Mommy!" while she tried to shop.

Finally, she blurted out, "I don't want to hear the word mommy for at to the lowest degree ten minutes!"

The boys vicious silent for a few seconds. Then one tugged on his mother's dress and said softly, "Excuse me, miss."

At our supermarket, I noticed a woman with iv boys and a babe. Her patience was wearing thin every bit the boys called out, "Mommy! Mommy!" while she tried to shop....

One time I'd finished reviewing my daughter's homework, I gave her an impromptu quiz. "What is a group of whales called?" I asked. "I'll give you a hint—it sounds like something you use to heed to music." "An iPod?" she guessed. "Shut," I said. "But what I'k thinking of is a fiddling smaller." "A Shuffle!"

In one case I'd finished reviewing my daughter'southward homework, I gave her an impromptu quiz. "What is a group of whales called?" I asked. "I'll give you a hint—information technology sounds like something...

During Sunday school, the substitute instructor asked my four-year-onetime what his proper name was. "Spider-Human," said my son.

"No, I mean your real proper name," pressed the teacher.

My son apologized. "Oh, I"1000 sorry. It"s Peter Parker."

During Lord's day school, the substitute teacher asked my four-year-former what his name was. "Spider-Man," said my son. "No, I mean your real name," pressed the teacher. My son apologized. "Oh,...

The highlight of our zoo trip was a peacock showing off its plumage. My four-year-sometime son was especially taken with information technology. That evening, he couldn't wait to tell his begetter: "Dad, guess what! I saw a Christmas tree come out of a chicken!"

The highlight of our zoo trip was a peacock showing off its plumage. My four-year-former son was particularly taken with it. That evening, he couldn't wait to tell his male parent:...

I dear playing Santa at the mall. But parents often have trouble getting young children to sit on my knee joint. Information technology took a lot of coaxing for one little girl to perch there, so I got straight to the bespeak. "What do you want most of all for Christmas?" I asked.

She answered, "Down!"

I honey playing Santa at the mall. Just parents oft have trouble getting immature children to sit down on my knee. It took a lot of coaxing for one little girl...

Concluding Thanksgiving, my niece came home with her school project: a beautiful autumnal foliage with the words "I am thankful for my mommy" printed on it.

Her eyes tearing, my sister said, "This ways so much to me."

Her daughter nodded. "I wanted to put 'Hannah Montana,' only my teacher wouldn't let me."

Terminal Thanksgiving, my niece came habitation with her school project: a beautiful autumnal leaf with the words "I am thankful for my mommy" printed on it. Her eyes fierce, my...

The first time my son was on a bike with training wheels, I shouted, "Stride back on the pedals and the bike will brake!"

He nodded but still rode straight into a bush-league.

"Why didn't you push back on the pedals?" I asked, helping him up.

"You said if I did, the wheel would intermission."

The first fourth dimension my son was on a wheel with grooming wheels, I shouted, "Step back on the pedals and the bike will restriction!" He nodded but still rode straight...

A little boy went to the library to check out a volume titled Comprehensive Guide for Mothers.

"Is this for your mother?" the librarian asked.

"No," said the boy.

"And so why are you lot checking information technology out?"

"Because I started collecting moths last week."

A little boy went to the library to check out a volume titled Comprehensive Guide for Mothers. "Is this for your female parent?" the librarian asked. "No," said the male child. "So...

To commemorate his first visit to our library, I gave a vi-year-sometime male child a bookmark. More than familiar with electronic gadgets than old-schoolhouse tools, he had no clue how it worked. So I demonstrated by placing information technology betwixt two pages, and so endmost the book. "When you beginning reading again, voilà!" I said, opening the book to my bookmarked page.

"Wow!" he said. "That'due south cool!"

To commemorate his first visit to our library, I gave a six-year-former male child a bookmark. More familiar with electronic gadgets than quondam-schoolhouse tools, he had no clue how information technology worked....

"Boys just like i thing," my ten-twelvemonth-old told a friend. Oh, no, the end of her innocence, I thought. Then she announced her finding: "PlayStations."

"Boys simply like one thing," my 10-yr-old told a friend. Oh, no, the terminate of her innocence, I thought. Then she appear her finding: "PlayStations."

My sister explained to my nephew how his voice would eventually change as he grew up. Tyler was exuberant at the prospect. "Absurd!" he said. "I hope I get a German accent."

My sister explained to my nephew how his vocalization would somewhen alter as he grew up. Tyler was exuberant at the prospect. "Cool!" he said. "I hope I get a...

While I was making a huge batch of snickerdoodle cookies, I asked my ten-twelvemonth-quondam to read the recipe and ingredients off the box to me, doubling them every bit he went along. He did every bit he was told. His first instruction: "Preheat the oven to 700 degrees."

While I was making a huge batch of snickerdoodle cookies, I asked my ten-twelvemonth-old to read the recipe and ingredients off the box to me, doubling them as he went...

Forget about Halloween. If y'all're really eager to frighten the kids, merely read them these headlines. "Idiot box ads heave eating of obese children"

Forget about Halloween. If y'all're actually eager to affright the kids, merely read them these headlines. "TV ads heave eating of obese children"

When he received a journal as a gift, my 8-yr-old son was mystified. "Mom, what am I supposed to do with this? The pages are blank."

"You lot write downwardly interesting stuff that happens to you," I said.

"So it's like a blog … on paper."

When he received a journal every bit a gift, my eight-year-one-time son was mystified. "Mom, what am I supposed to exercise with this? The pages are blank." "You write downward interesting...

When my ex-Marine male parent-in-law was at my house, our half dozen-yr-quondam neighbor came past to play with my kids.

I asked her if she knew who he was. She looked upward at him with her large blueish eyes and said, "I don't remember what his name is, but I know he used to exist a submarine."

When my ex-Marine male parent-in-law was at my business firm, our six-yr-onetime neighbor came by to play with my kids. I asked her if she knew who he was. She looked up...

I love making clothes for my v-year-old granddaughter. And she, in turn, ever seems happy to accept them. The other day, I asked if she would similar me to brand her a skirt.

"Yes," she said. "But this time, could y'all make it look like it came from a store?"

I love making clothes for my five-year-old granddaughter. And she, in plough, e'er seems happy to accept them. The other 24-hour interval, I asked if she would similar me to make...

Up on the screen at our local multiplex, the star whispered to his female costar, "I want you to be my mistress."

"What's a mistress?" my eight-yr-onetime granddaughter yelled out.

Then the man gave the adult female a passionate kiss.

"Never mind," my granddaughter said.

Up on the screen at our local multiplex, the star whispered to his female person costar, "I desire you to be my mistress." "What's a mistress?" my eight-year-erstwhile granddaughter yelled out....

Tired of doom-and-gloom headlines? We are too! At Reader's Digest, we believe it'south our job to human action as an antidote to all the negativity in the news. That'south what convinced us to pick our June embrace model. Nosotros took one await at that face and couldn't assistance but smile. Hence, the nascency of our June encompass line: "Oh, cheer up!" Now nosotros're challenging you to share your funniest ideas about what the baby is thinking. Take a look at our cover and share your thoughts. We'll publish our favorites on readersdigest.com! [explanation id="" align="aligncenter" width="300"] June 2009 Cover[/explanation]

Tired of doom-and-gloom headlines? We are too! At Reader'southward Digest, we believe it'south our job to human action equally an antidote to all the negativity in the news. That'south what convinced united states to choice our June cover model. We took one expect at that face and couldn't assistance but grinning. Hence, the nascence of our June embrace line: "Oh, cheer upward!"

The 6 a.m. regulars at the dog run are, not surprisingly, a pet-oriented group. Recently John started discussing his trip. "The flight was atrocious! Nosotros were delayed for a few hours, and when we finally boarded, the infant backside me didn't stop crying for the whole flying."

Another dog run regular turned to him in surprise: "What did the owner do?"

The 6 a.g. regulars at the canis familiaris run are, not surprisingly, a pet-oriented group. Recently John started discussing his trip. "The flight was awful! We were delayed for a few...

At my ten-year-erstwhile's request, I loaded my Rolling Stones tunes onto his iPod.

"I had no thought yous liked the Stones," I said.

"Certain. I like all that old-fashioned music," he said.

"What exercise you hateful, 'quondam-fashioned music'?"

"You know," he said defensively. "Music from the 1900s."

At my ten-yr-old's request, I loaded my Rolling Stones tunes onto his iPod. "I had no idea you liked the Stones," I said. "Certain. I like all that onetime-fashioned music,"...

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the trunk, you lot pack-a the suitcase.

Knock! Knock!
Who'south in that location?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the trunk, yous pack-a the suitcase.

Knock! Knock!
Who'south in that location?
Amos.
Amos who?
A mosquito bit me!

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Amos.
Amos who?
A mosquito bit me!

Knock! Knock!
Boo
Boo who?
It's me, why are you crying?

Knock! Knock!
Boo
Boo who?
Information technology's me, why are y'all crying?

Knock! Knock!
Who's in that location?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup with me, and I'll tell you!

Knock! Knock!
Who'south there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup with me, and I'll tell you!

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Sam and Janet
Sam and Janet who?
Samenjanet evening.

Knock! Knock!
Who'southward in that location?
Sam and Janet
Sam and Janet who?
Samenjanet evening.

Knock! Knock!
Who's at that place..!
Wevill
Wevill who?
We will we will Rock you.

Knock! Knock!
Who's there..!
Wevill
Wevill who?
We will we will Rock you.

Knock! Knock!
Who'southward at that place?
Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you lot!

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you!

"Daddy," said my 11-year-old daughter, "I recollect I want to join the Regular army."

"Babe," I answered, "I think the Air Force would be a better choice for you."

"But I don't want to be a airplane pilot."

"You don't have to be a pilot," I told her. "At that place are other jobs in the Air Force."

Her answer: "I don't desire to be a flying attendant either."

"Daddy," said my 11-year-old daughter, "I think I want to join the Army." "Baby," I answered, "I recollect the Air Forcefulness would be a better pick for you." "But I...

Every morning, I practise a mad dash to driblet off my son Tyler at day intendance and so I tin get to work on time. My impatience hit dwelling 1 morning time when he piped upwardly from the back of the machine, "Our car is actually fast and everyone else's is slow because they're all idiots, right, Mom?"

Every morning, I practise a mad nuance to drop off my son Tyler at mean solar day care then I tin become to work on time. My impatience hit domicile 1 morning...

My cousin, a teacher, asked her young students, "Why should you never accept candy from strangers?" I girl knew. "Because information technology might be by the sell-by date."

My cousin, a teacher, asked her young students, "Why should you never accept processed from strangers?" One girl knew. "Because it might exist past the sell-by appointment."

My female parent taught for 11 years at a 24-hour interval-intendance center. One winter afternoon she was trying to evidence a young boy how to nix upwards his glaze. "The cloak-and-dagger," Mom said, "is to get this slice of the zipper to fit in the other side before you try to zip it up."

After struggling with the zipper for several minutes, the boy sighed and said, "Why does information technology take to be a underground?"

My female parent taught for 11 years at a day-care center. One winter afternoon she was trying to show a young boy how to zip upwardly his coat. "The secret," Mom...

Luke, our venturesome fourteen-month-sometime son, was at my mother-in-law's house. He was playing with her car keys when the phone rang. Later hanging up, my female parent-in-police realized that Luke had put the keys down someplace, but she couldn't notice them anywhere. Thinking quickly, she gave him another set up of keys.

As she pretended not to look, Luke toddled around the corner and into her bedroom. Then she watched as he advisedly placed the second fix of keys nether her bed—right next to the original car keys.

Luke, our venturesome 14-month-old son, was at my mother in law's house. He was playing with her car keys when the phone rang. Later hanging upwards, my mother-in-law realized that Luke had...

I had finished my Christmas shopping early and had wrapped all the presents. Having two curious children, I had to find a suitable hiding identify. I chose an platonic spot—the furnace room. I stacked the presents and covered them with a blanket, positive they'd remain undiscovered.

When I went to get the gifts to put them under the tree, I lifted the coating and there, stacked neatly on top of my gifts, were presents addressed to "Mom and Dad, From the Kids."

I had finished my Christmas shopping early and had wrapped all the presents. Having two curious children, I had to find a suitable hiding place. I chose an ideal spot—the...

When my girl was trivial, we took a holiday to Florida. Seated on the airplane nearly the fly, I pointed out to Rhonda that we were above the body of water. "Can you come across the water?" I asked her.

"No," she said, peering out the window at the wing, "but I tin meet the diving board."

When my daughter was piffling, we took a vacation to Florida. Seated on the airplane almost the fly, I pointed out to Rhonda that we were above the ocean. "Can...

My sis had been sick, and then I chosen to see how she was doing. My ten-yr-old niece answered the phone. "How-do-you-do," she whispered.

"Hi, honey. How's your female parent?" I asked.

"She's sleeping," she answered, again in a whisper.

"Did she become to the doctor?"

"Yep. She got some medicine," my niece said softly.

"Well, don't wake her up. But tell her I called. What are y'all doing, by the way?"

Again in a soft whisper, she answered, "Practicing my trumpet."

My sister had been sick, so I called to see how she was doing. My ten-year-old niece answered the phone. "Howdy," she whispered. "Hi, honey. How'due south your mother?" I asked....

When my neighbor'southward granddaughter introduced me to her young son, Brian, I said to him, "My grandchildren call me Mimi. Why don't you telephone call me that too?"

"I don't retrieve so," he retorted, and ran off after his mother.

Afterwards I was asked to baby-sit for Brian, and we hit it off wonderfully. As he snuggled upward to me, he said, "I don't care what your grandchildren say. I beloved you, Meanie."

When my neighbor's granddaughter introduced me to her young son, Brian, I said to him, "My grandchildren telephone call me Mimi. Why don't yous phone call me that besides?" "I don't recall...

One night our local newscaster was reading near an allegation that two Sesame Street characters, Bert and Ernie, were gay. The show'southward producer refuted this, pointing out that they were but puppets, not humans. They argued a lot and then fabricated up to show children how to resolve conflicts and stay friends.

While watching this written report, my wife, Donna, noticed that our seven-year-one-time daughter was also listening. Equally Donna struggled to come up with an caption for the term "gay," our crestfallen daughter said in dismay, "They're puppets?"

Ane night our local newscaster was reading about an allegation that 2 Sesame Street characters, Bert and Ernie, were gay. The show's producer refuted this, pointing out that they were...

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Source: https://www.rd.com/jokes/kids/page/3/

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